The 3 Things Erotica Has Taught Me

“We’re not so different, you and I.

Dr Evil – Austin Powers Trilogy

Throughout my ten plus years of writing, the one thing that is always present in every story – no matter how dark or fluffy – is that it’s ALL about connection. The heart of erotica lies in the characters, and without a believable connection, the whole thing falls apart.

Emotion, understanding and misunderstanding are a part of life, and they should be a part of your story, too (when appropriate). Your characters, whether human or imaginary creatures, need to connect. The connection can be positive, negative or one based entirely on a one-sided assumption, but it has to be present. Otherwise, your story won’t be something your readers canĀ feel.

“Distressed partners use different words but they are always asking the same basic questions, ‘Are you there for me? Do I matter to you? Will you come when I need you, when I call?’ Love is the best survival mechanism there is, and to feel suddenly emotionally cut off from a partner, disconnected, is terrifying.”

Sue Johnson – Hold Me Tight

THIS is the core of it all: Emotion. Even if it’s a one-sided tale of the time you were pinned down by uncaring alien robots and were made to cum over and over again in order to provide data for their experiments, we need to feel everything. We need to feel the characters, feel their distress, their joy, their fear and their anticipation. We need to be able to follow along with them as they progress throughout the story and understand their journey. We need to know why that was such a turn on for you, and we need to immerse ourselves in your situation.

And if your story is that of a couple, please, dear Lord, make them real!

Being yourself is very sexy, you know?

Erin Heatherton

There’s nothing less sexy than an annoying character. And what makes a character annoying? Turning them into a stereotype and nothing else. For the love of everything holy, ground them in reality. I’m begging you. The number of times I’ve read the blonde bombshell with big boobs and a mouth made for dick…and nothing more, is unbelievable.

I don’t care if you just give us one line about what she’s like; please, make her more than tits and ass! And that goes for the guys too! The ‘mysterious, moody stranger with the body of a God and a secret heart of gold that only you can see’ is fine IF – and I say this from experience – if he has a personality as well!

It doesn’t take much; a line about her eyes following a Poodle out of the shop and you wondering whether she hates them or loves them, or the fact that you notice a collection of detective novels on his shelf. Make your characters more than their physical attributes, and they’ll come alive for both you and your readers. Anything is better than nothing, and once you do this, they’ll become human.

Julia X

Wanna know my rates?

Published by Julia Rivers

Hi, I'm Julia. I write custom erotica and read naughty, naughty audio. Check out my site for more information on how to get one of your very own! julia.rivers.writes@gmail.com

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